Tag Archives: herd behavior

Friends • Photo Restoration • 55 • Gabičko • Bullies

• In elementary school, I wasn’t overly bothered by the physical nature of bullying. What really got under my skin was the hatred in their eyes. Ally Kennelfry*, Jell Ruleimi*, and their leader, Jean Hopenix* – this trio were Holy Rosary’s mean girls in my day.  I still remember seeing the disgust in their eyes when I would catch their stare. Following their lead was the class alpha-male, Canon Sooner*. What shocked me the most was when I bumped into them individually – they would be nice all of a sudden. But as soon as they were together their nastiness came out like fireworks. On a few occasions I witnessed how herd behavior manifests itself, when kids turn from observers to participants. The students would feed off of collective hysteria and find themselves as fellow bullies. Thankfully, by the seventh and eighth grade new kids joined our class. As they became new targets, the bullies attention diverted away from me. Maybe puberty had a part to play, as well.

• I had to deal with a lot of anger issues from the many years I spent in that war zone. I had built up many layers of defense, The problem is that the bullied often becomes the bully. I first realized this when my cousin Roman pulled me aside after swim practice one day. I had joined the Burlington YMCA swim team when I was eleven years old. Roman started six months later. He said that the other kids didn’t like me because I was being mean to them. I was shocked to hear that, and it became a turning point in my behavior. I started to be nicer to everyone on the swim team, realizing that I needed to segment my behavior from school.

• Being bullied either makes you stronger, or it can break you down. I often look back at those years and feel that I kept my sanity because I had three sets of friends: Those on the swim team, my Czechoslovakian friends, and then there were the school kids. Since I was only hated at school, I managed to rationalized that the problem wasn’t in me.

• When I watch movies with an antagonist, I often wonder if real life bullies identify with the villain, or with the hero. I have always identified with the hero, even if I have played both sides at different stages in my life.

*Names have been modified to protect the guilty.

• Digital Photo Restoration

 6 minutes 8 seconds

94 - Prague · Gabriel Dusil (Rocc Computers)94 – Prague · Gabriel Dusil (Rocc Computers)

93.Nov - Prague · Gabriel Dusil (empty beer)
93.Nov – Prague · Gabriel Dusil (empty beer)

 

93.Nov - Prague · Gabriel Dusil (cigar & beer)
93.Nov – Prague · Gabriel Dusil (cigar & beer)

 

94.Jun - Prague · Gabriel Dusil
94.Jun – Prague · Gabriel Dusil
95 - Prague · Gabriel Dusil
95 – Prague · Gabriel Dusil
96 - Burlington · Gabriel Dusil (sleeping)
96 – Burlington · Gabriel Dusil (sleeping)
97.Aug - Prague · Gabriel Dusil
97.Aug – Prague · Gabriel Dusil
99.Oct - Antigua · Gabriel Dusil (beach)
99.Oct – Antigua · Gabriel Dusil (beach)
99.Sep.25 - Prague · Gabriel Dusil (wedding reception)
99.Sep.25 – Prague · Gabriel Dusil (wedding reception)
99.Sep.25 - Prague · Gabriel Dusil (wedding, getting ready)
99.Sep.25 – Prague · Gabriel Dusil (wedding, getting ready)

 

Family • Photo Restoration • 39 • Gabičko • Chapter II

Chapter II • 4,476 Days

• I had a strong mother to carry me into teenage-hood. I found my strength in her, even if I didn’t realize it at the time.  Losing my father at 12 meant missing out on the opportunity to absorbing many of his traits.  As I entered puberty I completely ignored the testosterone infused raw-raw spirit of team sports, for instance. I had no interest in football, soccer, or baseball. To me it was just herd behavior, and that reminded me of being bullied in elementary school. I watched as passive by-standards got caught up in the frenzy of the crowd, suddenly finding themselves participating with the bullies. I still had a competitive spirit and found my strength in individual sports like swimming and martial arts. I often felt that the war zone I experienced in elementary school made me stronger, preparing me for various battles I faced in the corporate world.

• Throughout my teens I acquired my emotional intelligence from my mother. She was the disciplinarian, but underneath her tough exterior was a loving heart. I saw that more as I grew up.  I realize in hindsight she had a profound effect my emotional sensitivity, and how I expressed it.  I was emotionally complicated, and it effected my social interactions in positive and negative ways. Mainly my girlfriends noticed it, as they were much closer to my emotions than others. I looked into someone’s eyes and see their soul. It was my way of understanding what made then tick. I sometimes needed to avoid eye contact to not see that part of them. Other times I found it unnerving when I couldn’t immediately see who they really were. As if they were hiding something. In business I would walk into a room and feel the layer of emotion that dictated the meeting. Then I would deliberately change it to suit my agenda. Controlling the room’s emotion allowed me to control the meeting.

Chapters

If you missed the other chapters, you can find them here:

• Digital Photo Restoration

 6 minutes 8 seconds

87.Jun - Burlington · Eva & Gabriel Dusil (Aldershot High School, graduation)
87.Jun – Burlington · Eva & Gabriel Dusil (Aldershot High School, graduation)
87.Jun - Burlington · Gabriel & Eva Dusil (high school graduation)
87.Jun – Burlington · Gabriel & Eva Dusil (high school graduation)
87.Sep.6 - Kingston · Eva & Gabriel Dusil (Queens University)
87.Sep.6 – Kingston · Eva & Gabriel Dusil (Queens University)
88.Jun.28 - Burlington · Alica & Eva Dusil (Holy Rosary, graduation)
88.Jun.28 – Burlington · Alica & Eva Dusil (Holy Rosary, graduation)
90.Dec.24 - Burlington · Gabriel, Eva & Alica Dusil (christmas)
90.Dec.24 – Burlington · Gabriel, Eva & Alica Dusil (Christmas)
86.Sep.18 - Burlington · Eva & Gabriel Dusil
86.Sep.18 – Burlington · Eva & Gabriel Dusil
91.Dec.24 - Burlington · Eva, Alica & Gabriel Dusil (christmas)
91.Dec.24 – Burlington · Eva, Alica & Gabriel Dusil (christmas)
92.Dec.24 - Burlington · Eva & Gabriel Dusil (family room)
92.Dec.24 – Burlington · Eva & Gabriel Dusil (family room)
96.Apr.14 - Burlington · Eva & Gabriel (driveway)
96.Apr.14 – Burlington · Eva & Gabriel (driveway)
96.Dec - Burlington · Eva Dusil (Christmas)
96.Dec – Burlington · Eva Dusil (Christmas)

 

86.Sep.18 - Burlington · Eva & Gabriel Dusil (premiere pro)